Someone Like You

This note below might or might not be a fictitious story)

There's always questions about him.

What kind of person he really is...

whether he really is a bad guy like what people said, or does he actually has the other glimpse of sincerity, the sweet side that i secretly peeped out.

whether he still the same person i knew the last time we met each other..

Whether he finally see me as a woman instead of little girl...

whether he still remember the memory only we both know..

whether he missed me the way i missed him...

does he ever love me...

And importantly, did i actually fall for him...
or this feeling is just an infatuation...

Feeling indeed could be very confusing..

There is a big difference between like and love. I never really sure with my feeling, nor could i ever differentiate both. One thing for sure, I never loved anybody other than my family in my life so far. For me, love is just too complicated. And my life has already way too complicated just as it is, thank you very much. So, if i ever felt any interest toward some guys, i will kept denyng that feeling, pressing and pressing, until it is disappear. And it works, all the time.

So i did it again this time. I kept denyng my feeling. He once asked me did i like him? And i said no.. That time, i thought, if things were good between us, why should i made it complicated with this love issue? So, time passed, and we went separate ways, maintaining this goodfriend' relationship, and im fine with that. We both chasing our own dreams, living in different paths, updating our stories once in a while, never let both of us lost contact. And it's good to have someone that care about you, asking how you're doing and so on. But even after a while, i still not sure with my feeling towards him. I did care about him. Yes, i like his personality. But love? Maybe not yet.

But still, when recently i heard, that he already found the right girl for him, i felt quite sad. I know i should be happy for him. If you really care about some one, you should be happy when that person is happy, and i did. I really am. I wish for every blessings for both of them. It's just that, somehow, in the deepest corner of my heart, i felt like i lost something without even sure what i've lost.

So, that night, i might be sad a lil bit, but overall, im fine.

I listened to Adele songs, and decided to sing and record it when i feel better in the next day.

And indeed i feel pretty much good, when i woke up the next morning. Of course i still care for him, but hey, im prettty sure that it is just the matter of time till i finally find the right one for me. And by that time, when i meet that person, i wont question my feeling, coz i'll know that he is real and my feeling is reall too. Just like love is real.